Summary of this semester

I am sad to say this but the class that I have been sharing about is coming to a close. The semester is over and I will be closing up talking about this class. But I hope I wont be gone from this blog forever. Starting this class I signed up because I needed a few more credits for my pre- requisites. I had no idea that this class would be my favorite class and that I would learn SO MUCH. I looked forward to this class every week and couldn't wait till the evening so I could tell my family the interesting things that I learned that day in my family relations class. I believe that I liked this class so much because it can really help me in my every day life. I am not married and I do not have any kids but I loved learning and retaining the information to keep in the back of my brain for when those moments do come around. I was told to share ten things that I learned from this class and I would like to share some of those with you today to summarize the past few months in this class. Cohabiting-

I really enjoyed learning about the facts and studies people have done on when people live together before they are married. There was a study I remember our professor talking about: If you live together before marriage you are more likely to get a divorce after five to seven years than if you waited till marriage to live together. Sexual Intimacy- I know this could be a very uncomfortable topic but I learned so much from it that I do not want to forget.Men are known to want to have sex more than women. Now remember that is not always true with every relationship. Women like to snuggle and be more emotionally there and men prefer to be more physical. Girls like to be stable in emotional states and boys like to be stable in physical states. Now that can be very hard and maybe even disagree with others because the boy might feel like the girl doesn't love him because she does not want to have sex with him every night. That is why you need to have a conversation with your husband or wife and explain how you are feeling and find a way on how to meet in the middle. Relationship Attachment Model-The RAM Model was produced by Dr. John Van Epp in his research regarding relationships progression. It’s a simple way to look at how relationships should grow to become healthy relationships. You should be increasing it from left to right for a healthy growth. It needs to go in order or there could be possible problems in the relationship. Teach your kids to make their own decisions-This might have not been in a textbook but it really stood out to me when the professor shared about how he let his daughter pick out her outfit for kindergarten and the mom went crazy when she saw mix matched clothes. You have to teach your kids and then let them choose their decisions you cannot control your kids forever. And lastly, Fathers are just as important as mothers-I feel like fathers get left in the dust sometimes and they deserve a lot of credit. Fathers play a huge role in the family and kids suffer from horrible consequences if a father isn’t in the home, like they are more likely to get involved in drugs, pornography, and gang activity and are more likely to become sexually promiscuous later into their lives. These are just a few things that I have learned from this class and I could go on and on but I think I shared the most important ones.

-Claire

Parenting

Parenting is one of the most important things you could ever do in your life. You bring a child into this world and teach them about life and how to live. It can be very hard to do but in the end it is so worth it. Raising kids can be very hard because kids are very needy but they are supposed to be, they don't know any better. You have to know how to teach them though and how to handle it. In class we talked about 5 needs for children written by Popkins. The five needs are 1. All children have a need for belonging and contact which can be physical contact or even eye contact. Everyone wants to feel wanted and belonged.If this is not there then the child could get very sick. 2. No sense for belonging- every child wants to feel like they have a home and that someone wants them and feels loved. 3. Need for power- kids want to feel like they have a say in things and also need someone who is above them that has power, usually a parent. It is needed for responsibility and ways to learn.4. Protection- Children was to feel safe and that is the parents job. 5. Withdrawl- children can be traumatized if they feel that they are being withdrawn. It can be the worst thing for a child.
Brother Williams shared a story about a hospital where half of the babies had a higher mortality rate than the other side of the hospital. Everyone was so confused and they swapped out sanitation ways and even swapped doctors on both sides. No one knew what the problem could be. Nothing changed when they made all of those changes. They later realized that there was a cleaning lady that after she was done cleaning, she would rock the babies and love them. They realized that those babies were living longer because they were having contact and love. I loved that story because that just shows that people cannot live without contact and love. Babies have been in a mothers womb for 9 months straight and has felt warm and loved and then comes out and it cold and alone. This is not just for babies either. Everyone needs contact and that is where parenting comes in. Parents are there to love their kids and give them contact. It can make the kids healthier- socially, mentally and even physically.
What is your favorite part of parenting?

Fathers and Finance

Fathers are a wonderful thing and should be celebrated everyday. They play a huge role in the family. They show how to provide and protect. I know a lot of families are different and some do not have fathers which is fine because everyone has different circumstances. But a fatherly figure doesn't always have to be a dad. A fatherly figure can be a grandpa, uncle, bishop, church leader, neighbor, or family friend. Everyone needs a fatherly figure in their life. They teach you things that mothers cannot. A father can be there for finances which doesn't always mean just the money brought in but how the money is used. Back in the days fathers were usually the main providers and brought in all of the money. Nowadays that is not usual. Both parents work now and aren't always there for their kids. Mothers used to stay home for the kids and nurture them and fathers were gone to work to provide and make money for the family. We also talked about finances and we talked about paying kids for chores and grades as a reward. Our professor recommended to not do that. It is not good. Most kids will most likely end up not wanting to do it or hate it because they see it as a job and not a chore to help around the house. It does not teach your kids the value of keeping the house clean and being told what to do and to respect adults.If you pay your kid every time they do something then from then on they will expect money for doing anything. If you then ask them to go put away their clothes they will be like " oh okay I will do it for five dollars".That is not how children should be raised.  Manage money before it manages you. You need to have a good saving management and ways to save money and how to budget. Dave Ramsey is a great example on how to save money and is very wise on that type of stuff. Budgeting is a very good thing to do and having a savings account is also very wise. You never know what emergency will happen in your life that will need you to have a big chunk of money on hand and need it right then. Savings can be hard but it will always be good to know that you have money on hand that is there in case of emergencies. What are some good savings tips that you have and would like to share with others?
Have a good day!
XOXO
-Claire